Notes to people who will never read them

-Dear black guy in the white suit who tripped in the uptown funk music video, I noticed.
-Dear mop top kid in my creative writing class, I hope I've made you feel comfortable.
-Dear Chase and Caleb, I met you because of Sam, I hope you feel like I like you.
-Dear muscly kid who drives an A Plus, thank you for your perspective.
-Dear silver haired man that cares, thanks for caring.
-Brother Durant, I hope you don't notice my eyes when they shut for more than a few seconds, I'm trying to be respectful.
-Dear career stereotypes about scientists and engineers and the marketers, some may be true, but character is what counts.
-Dear pencil-drilled holes in desks, I don't know what amount of pain or boredom birthed your existence.
-Dear kid who doesn't know how he smells, I don't mind because I know your past, I just hope others choose to understand too.
-Dear Melodians and Toots & Maytals, I recognize you.
-Dear white iPhone case and Dear Giraffe iPhone case, please be grateful that virtuous young daughters of God hold you in their hands.
-Dear people who have snarked at my journal entry on page 12, I'm a little self-conscious of writing in purple now.
-Dear purple pen I write with, I'll still write with you because you make me feel sensitive, self-conscious, and vulnerable. Because you remind me of killing me in that purple long sleeve shirt, and a month.
-Dear pulsing gold pants that are on the father's dancing hips, you left me speechless.
-Dear camera man with the camo pants, long sleeve jean shirt, and forest green beret; thanks for filming Frank's dunk against AF.
-Dear Grand Poobah, you're the successor to ISIS, you're a terrorist, and I believe that is wrong. But you do have a pretty cool name :)
-Dear people who know my pen name, I sometimes have to filter stuff for you, sometimes I don't.